“Stop doing that.” “You’re wrong.” “Do what I tell you.” “Because I said so…”

If that’s a sampling of what you’re telling your employees and all you’re getting for your effort is turnover, follow your own advice and stop doing that.

Times have changed. Back in the day, as they now say, employers ruled and employees obeyed. If employees did as they were told (as most did) without questioning rules or rulers, they stayed and got paid. The obedient were called loyal and for the most part they worked hard, kept their heads down and retired with a watch that ticked better than most of the tickers they retired with. Employees gave the company what it wanted; dedication. The company reciprocated with what employees wanted; security.

Now, not so much. Employees want to make a difference where they work, they want to be part of the answer, and they want to be recognized for contributing to the outcome. They want opportunities to learn from experience; to make decisions, or at least weigh in on them, and they want compensation commensurate with the responsibilities they’re given and the instability they endure.

These employees have a voice and want to use it. If they’re told to do as they’re told, they’re as likely to quit and physically leave, as they are to emotionally quit and physically stay.  These employees are looking for opportunity and the freedom to leverage it. To them, loyalty is a seven-letter word that loosely translated means take care of yourself because no one else will.

What happened to cause the shift from we to me? You’ll find many of the answers in the early eighties; not eighty-year olds, the 1980’s.  That’s when buyouts, mergers and acquisitions turned headline news into back home realities. Companies that were perceived as rock solid were suddenly in play and steady employment became a contradiction in terms. It seemed like everything and everyone was up for grabs. Middle managers who dedicated their lives to their companies learned that the cheese had moved, the gold watch didn’t work, and retirement wasn’t going to happen any time soon.

These downsized, right sized, and other-wise laid off employees went home and shared their fate with their families and taught their children hard earned lessons from experience: take care of yourself, think for yourself, be as independent as you are self-reliant. Do work that has meaning to you and value to others, so when you choose to move on, the inventory is in your head.

Yesterday’s children are today’s work force. The want to make a difference and they want to be successful. If they don’t achieve the former they won’t attain the latter and they’ll keep looking until they do.

Employers who get it, ‘manage by walking around’. They coach the talent on their team to play to their strengths, not their weaknesses. They catch employees ‘doing it right’ and recognize them for it. They discover potential and create opportunities for development.  They consciously include and intentionally involve their employees’ perspective and as a result employees have a greater stake in the outcome.

If your style is command and control, you’re plagued by high turnover and low productivity, you know what to stop doing but don’t what to start in its place, step back and reassess. Your employees want you to tell them the mission and the part you want them to play in achieving it. They want you to trust them, to develop them, to give them opportunities to learn from experience, to develop accountability along with responsibility and they want solid, real-time, one on one constructive feedback, and they want to get it from you.