Last week’s column focused on an unhappy, conflicted employee who feels unappreciated and undervalued. She wants to quit her current job, hoping to get more of what she needs somewhere else and she’s afraid that if she leaves, she won’t succeed.

She dislikes being invisible even as she stands in the shadows. She wants more pay and promotions yet is satisfied with a no-risk job in a low risk setting because it allows her to “not have to do any more than I want to.”

Her self-perception is that she’s a strong contributor who adds value. Others experience her as doing as little as possible and getting by as best she can. They see no reason for her to advance or to pay her more to do what is seen as average effort. They are willing to continue her employment because she doesn’t cause problems and doesn’t generate complaints.

Why bother to tell the story? Because she, like many others, are at the cusp of being shocked by a rude awakening. Being average, middling, run of the mill, is not going to be good enough. There are too many employees and soon-to-be’s who are willing and wanting to do more and learn more, challenge and be challenged, and they’re elbowing out change-resisting sub-par performers who will have difficulty finding other jobs that pay as well, benefits that do as much, and employers as willing to pay for yesterday’s performance on today’s jobs.

She says that all she wants is that “people miss me when I’m away, smile when I return, and say ‘thank you’ at the end of the day.” She wants to know “is that asking too much?”

It’s not asking too much unless she’s asking that the workplace replace the security of family, co-workers provide the intimacy of friendship, and courtesy continue as the coin of the realm. She may be disappointed about the first two. The third, courtesy, should be an expectation that continues to be extended and met, consistently, and over time, by everyone, no matter the job, the workplace, or the employer.

She asks for employers who will “tell me what to do, tell me I’m doing it well, and tell me I’m appreciated for it.”

Today’s employers need to set specific expectations, offer specialized training, provide semi-annual performance reviews and give just in time feedback. These employers also need to step back and allow the employee time to demonstrate competency in order to objectively determine if the employee is progressing, developing, and readying him or herself for this and the next opportunity.

Employees need to ask for and be open to feedback. They need to challenge themselves to do more than just enough; to learn more than what’s adequate; and to develop in areas that will be strategic assets not just tactical improvements.

Employees who want pay increases demonstrate their ability to add value. Employees who want promotions demonstrate their ability and desire to manage calculated risks, lead change, and accept accountability for the results.

As difficult as it may be to hear, “What have you done for me lately? ” is the mantra of most employers. What you did yesterday, last week, or last year, is history. What you can do for me today, tomorrow, and six months from now is the currency that’s in demand.

Nice is good. Nice people fit in. Nice people achieve and advance when they combine their good will, respectful responses, and team-oriented behaviors with tactical know-how, strategic insights, and action- to- goal focus that results in wins for the company and for all stakeholders invested in the outcome.