You’ve unwrapped your gifts, returned from an airport where you probably spent more time than at your intended destination and are ready to begin the New Year. You’re filled with a resolve to… to do what? Why? And how differently will you do it?
If you’ve had a little breathing space during the holidays you may have given serious thought to how you’d like to be in the coming year. Perhaps you’ve made a list of resolutions, vowing to make substantive changes in the ways you relate to others, in the career directions you’ll take, and how you’ll want to feel about yourself as you make those changes.
If you’re like most people, the best of intentions, toward self and others, seem to last a few weeks and are then replaced by the creep of day to day events that work their way into the crevices of determination and focus. Old habits are back and it’s business as usual.
Many of us don’t want to promise to do anything differently. We’ve disappointed others and ourselves too often to willingly take that route again.
Others would rather not think about doing anything differently since that would suggest what we were doing and where we were heading was in some way flawed. We want to move ahead, accepting our mistakes and celebrating our luck the same way we always have.
And then there are those of us who just can’t think of anything that we want to do differently. It’s not that we’re refusing the notion or avoiding the consequence, it’s just that things are rocking along pretty well. Why think, why promise, and why tinker?
If you live somewhere between the “if I ain’t broke why fix me” folks and those who are constantly reinventing themselves, here are a few resolutions you might want to consider:
If I’m too passive and miss out on opportunities that could be mine, I’m going to get out there and make them happen.
If I don’t know how to become more sure of myself and confident in my actions, I’ll learn from people who do it best. I’ll practice by making mistakes and learning from them. I’ll admit when I’m wrong and take credit when I’m right.
I’ll forgive people more quickly and ask that they do the same for me. If they won’t, I’ll work hard to change the outcome I created. If I can’t, I’ll learn from it and move beyond it.
When I need to learn more than I know, I’ll take the initiative and get the knowledge I want without waiting for others to teach me.
I’ll learn to respect myself and others. I’ll become more aware that what happens around me affects more than just me. I’ll ask people I trust to tell me how can I help, and what can I do, to become a more effective player, regardless of the game.
Sometimes it’s easier to resolve what you won’t do instead of what you will. For example:
I won’t have to get fired to learn what I value about my job.
I won’t quit when I’m frustrated.
I won’t use anger to keep fear away.
I won’t break something to avoid fixing it.
I won’t argue so that I can be heard.
I won’t shout others down when I don’t want to listen to what they say.
I won’t let illness teach me to value each day.
I won’t be less than I can be, so others can be more.
I won’t measure my worth at the expense of others.
You can become who you want to be, without having to deny others encouragement, support, and respect. You can choose to live a full, productive life that embraces all that is good in yourself and others.
It’s not how you word it; it’s how you work it.
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Yes! You may use this article by Executive and Career Coach, Joyce Richman, in your blog, article in your blog, newsletter or website as long as you include the following bio box:
Joyce Richman (www.joycerichman.com) has been specializing in executive and career coaching since she started her own practice in 1982. She works in a variety of environments including: higher education, manufacturing, sales, marketing, media, technology, pharmaceuticals, medicine, banking and finance, service, IT, and non-profit sectors. A member of the adjunct faculty at the Center for Creative Leadership, Joyce is certified to administer a number of feedback and psychological instruments. Joyce is a weekly guest on WFMY-TV and the career columnist for The Greensboro News & Record. She is the author of Roads, Routes and Ruts: A Guidebook to Career Success and co-author of Getting Your Kid Out of the House and Into a Job. A popular speaker, Richman conducts seminars and workshops throughout the United States, Canada and Europe. Her coaching profile can be found at TheCoachingAssociation.com