It’s noon and you’re driving to a crosstown lunch meeting with a key client. You were late leaving the office and now you’re stuck in traffic. It’s hot, you’re frustrated and agitated and focused on one thing only: getting to the restaurant before you lose the client and the account. The car in front of you is barely moving so you lean on the horn and pull out to pass it and ka-bam! You’re hit from the rear by a car that appears out of nowhere.
It’s no different at work. You get focused on an objective, run short on time, need to deliver, don’t have what you need, run into roadblocks, start pushing too hard and get blindsided by some yahoo who thinks you’re acting like a bozo.
You have a blind spot when your boss says what you’re doing is getting in the way of what you’re supposed to do, and he wants you to stop the former and get going on the latter. And you don’t know what in the world he’s talking about.
You have a blind spot when you’re getting feedback that you’re aloof and not a team player when you think you’re independent and self-starting.
You have a blind spot when the email says you’re rude and insensitive and you think you’re outgoing and spontaneous.
Blind spots aren’t potholes; if they were you’d see them and avoid them. You don’t see what’s in your blind spot because you’re not looking.
What can you do? Pay attention to what’s going on around you.
Focus on what you want to achieve and be aware of what others need of you. Plan ahead and recognize the opportunities as well as the consequences that flow from the choices you make.
How would you describe yourself? Independent, preferring to work alone rather than with others, wanting time and space to think before responding to others, preferring email to face-to-face meetings. Do you see how the very behaviors you value could be perceived as difficult and off-putting by those who prefer to work on teams, to meet and make decisions by consensus?
You don’t have to become someone who you are not. You don’t have to compromise your values . You don’t have to become unethical, immoral, or in any way less of a person that you aspire to be in your effort to avoid a blindsiding.
You do need to become more aware of the impact you have on others and to square your intentions with that impact. If you want to be that “bull in a china shop,” to offend, to impose, to insult, go ahead, be my guest. And pay for the damage you cause. But if that is not your intention, if, instead, you want to be friendly, fun, and full of possibilities, or reserved, bottom line, and task focused, be that person in ways that are as acceptable to others as they are satisfying to you.
