“Don’t worry! You’ll be great! If I can do this job anybody can!”
You do worry. You don’t know what you’re doing, what your boss expects, and you feel like you’re failing. You want guidance.
“What are you worried about? I’d tell you if there were a problem, you’re fine!”
You’re not fine. You’re making mistakes. You’ve tried to figure it out but you’re in over your head. You’ve asked for help but your boss is never around. When he is, he’s in meetings or on the phone. You’ve been struggling for months and dread going to work. Finally, late on a Friday afternoon, your boss wants to see you.
“You’re a nice guy and people like you, but it’s obvious you can’t handle this job. You need to leave. Security will walk you to your car. My admin can ship your personal items to you next week.”
It’s an insecure employee’s worst nightmare.
Who’s accountable for an employee’s success? Should interviewers and applicants do a better job at the match game?
The boss weighs in:
“I hired this employee because he convinced me he could do the work. I described the challenges and opportunities and he kept selling me on his ability to get the job done. I assumed his confidence was well founded. I believed him when he said he was ready; that he didn’t have questions or concerns; that he could handle whatever I threw at him.
Why can’t employers and their employees recognize an abyss before plunging into it?
“He had barely warmed the chair when he started calling me with picayune questions, asking permission, needing someone to take him by the hand. I didn’t have time to tell him how to do his job. I blew it off and told him not to worry, that I trusted him to get it done.
He called again and said he wanted training that he needed help, and then I started worrying. What’s wrong with this guy? So I gave him what I thought he wanted, a pat on the back. I told him I wouldn’t have hired him if he didn’t know what he was doing. He didn’t, but I had bigger issues to contend with than his insecurities, so I let it go. It wasn’t until half his staff was out the door and the rest were putting on their coats that I knew I had to step in. That’s when I realized how little he’d accomplished. It was a bad hire and he needed to go.”
Whatever your title or position, just about everyone can learn something from this cautionary tale:
Know your weakness as well as your strengths. Either category, overdone, can be your undoing. If you oversell your confidence to someone who over- assumes your talent, both of you lose. If you under-assume your abilities and second guess your actions, both of you lose. If you neglect what you ought, to do what’s for naught, both of you lose.
Who and what wins? People who take the time to clarify assumptions, specify expectations, verify understanding; people who follow- through and follow- up; people who provide access, training, and support.
Interviewers who make good hires are alchemists who combine art, history, and science.
There’s art in separating the meaning from the message that’s embedded in boss-subordinate word choices and body language. There’s history in the juxtaposition of success factors and track records. There’s science in the skillful blending and catalytic mixing of their opposing and complementary skills, strengths, talents, and styles.
Whatever side of the table you sit, make the best choices you can with the best information you can find. Change happens. Resilience counts. Integrity matters. Learn from mistakes, lead with courage and listen with compassion.
